'Love. What is the true meaning of it? Pain and agony? Shredded heart and tears? Or laughter and happiness? You can choose your path....'

I've been in love. But not the real love. This my own heart-broken story...

I was 12 about two years ago. I log into my facebook and pop! Chatbox came out.. And the name of the sender is Zahirul Aiman. My first 'cinta monyet'. He asks me to be his GF. Me, being stupid just accepted his offer to be his girlfriend. We exchanged phone numbers. 

One day, I decided to text him. And we texted and texted. Sometimes I don't understand what is his message saying. But... It only last for like about 4 months. We broke up on my Year Six Gala Day. The theme of the Gala Day was red. Red.... It was the colour of my broken and bleeding heart. Before we broke up, we have a fight. I revealed that I was not a 'SLIM'  girl. He said that I was lying to him all this time but I didn't. Well, there goes my first 'cinta monyet'. Full with pain. But I didn't cry. I talked and make jokes with the person who is sitting next to me. I can forget my sadness with a happy smile.

That was just the starting of my torture... But there's more.

Zahirul made me suffer when he gave my number to his dorm friends. All of his friend texted me day and night. I can't stand it. I cried. Im scared. I don't know why I am so scared. I hate him. Very much. I wanted to forget him. 

Just go away from my life. Please ='(

Then, on one faithful day, my second love, Idham, texted me introducing himself. He said that he got my number from his friend. He asked me to be his girlfriend. I accepted it. And guess what? It lasted for about 7 months like that. My relationship with Idham is just so full with happiness. He always loves to make silly jokes to me when I sulk. He always makes me smile whether I am not happy and always help me solve my problems. But, until one limit, he didn't text or call me. And then, I get a text from Zahirul. He said that Idham is schooling in the same school as he is. I was shocked and dissapointed at the same time. HE said that he is schooling in Shah Alam. After Zahirul texted me, I texted him.

I ask him to be honest with me. He said okay. I pop out the question. He answers it. He says that, the first time he texted me, his motive is only to fool me. But, as he texted me, he fell in love with me. He said that he didn't mean to lie to me. I accepted his apologies and make him promise to not lie again but......

HE LIED TO ME AGAIN.

His age is actually 15 but, he said that he was 14. I was 13 when I am his girlfriend. I am being dissapointed for the second time. I ask him for explaination. He just apologies. I forgive you honey. But, just that one day, I messaged him on facebook asking for a break-up. He accepted the break-up and there goes my second boy. Bye-bye.

From that point, I promise myself. I will, never ever ever ever fall in love with a boy again. If that boy wants me, come to my house to meet my parents and take my hand in marriage.

Sorry if I'm being selfish but, I promised myself. When I make a promise, I will keep it. Forever.

Thanks For Reading,

Sarah Awesome.